Leave Jessica aloooone!!!

30 Jan

OMG you guys, Jessica Simpson got SOOOOOO fat…!

Look at that:

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(Pictures from: Popcrunch.com)

 

Isn’t she, like, tooootally repulsive?

 

OK, let’s get real, here, people. This girl isn’t fat. Hell, she probably wouldn’t even make it in the chubby club, so give her a break, k?

For the record, I don’t give a flying fuck about Jessica Simpson. I personally find her to be a dumb airhead and a mediocre singer with annoying mannerisms.

That said, she comes across as a nice enough person, and she’s completely harmless. So what if she put on a couple of pounds?

Everyone is ripping on Lindsay Lohan because she’s too thin, but Daisy Duke shows up bloated in public and there’s an outcry about her being overweight? Come on! What the fuck is it that you want already?

The girl has curves, and I give her props for not hiding it.

***

Oh. My. God.

 

I cannot believe I just defended Jessica Simpson.

I can’t even believe I wrote a post about Jessica Simpson.

 

I need to go and take a very long, very hot shower.

But not before making a bitchy comment about her outfit, which is, I’ll give you that, absolutely fucking horrendous. I mean, isn’t one leopard-printed belt hideous enough? So why wear two? As for the pervert who invented the high-waisted pants, he or she should be condemned to wear a glow-in-the-dark unitard for the rest of his or her life.

 

I’m done. On a final note, leave Jessica alone.

Dammit.

 

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5 Responses to “Leave Jessica aloooone!!!”

  1. Roy February 4, 2009 at 6:11 pm #

    Jessica looks better with a couple of extra pounds if you ask me.
    See ya later

    Toodle pip

    Roy

    Like

  2. salomey5 February 4, 2009 at 6:31 pm #

    ROY!!!!

    Thanks for dropping by and practising what you blog about! 😉

    I spammed your blog a little more, BTW!

    Agreed on Jessica. She looks just fine.
    When did looking healthy become synonym of “fat”?
    The media needs to STFU once in a while.

    Like

  3. Nosesplash February 9, 2009 at 1:08 pm #

    I like the schizophrenic nature of this post. Great stuff.

    http://www.nosesplash.com

    Like

  4. cheezmunky February 14, 2009 at 12:09 pm #

    I’m not surprised about people calling her fat. I’m more surprised by the fact that PEOPLE ARE STILL PAYING HER TO SING?!!?!?!!!! Honestly…. don’t we have enough pretty, untalented blonde singers? Do we really need to have Jessica’s slightly thick ass being berated on the news?

    Like

  5. Taylor February 26, 2009 at 8:19 pm #

    Too funny

    Like

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