If you had told me six months ago that I would one day find myself campaigning for a Palin, I would have had you wrapped in straight jacket faster than Mama Grizzly can say “Gotcha!”
Six months later, here I am, begging you all to pick up the phone and/or get online tonight and vote your asses off for Bristol Palin to become the eleventh winner of Dancing With The Stars, and the most glaringly undeserving person ever to snatch that tacky mirror ball trinket they dare call a trophy.
I beseech you, do it.
Do it for the lulz.
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Two blondes down, how many more to go?
I just found out that both Jewel and Nancy O’Dell from Access Hollywood dropped off cheese-fest Dancing With the Stars. And that, just days before it’s slated to start.
Cause: some shit about torn ligaments, smashed knees or whatever.
Yes, you are reading right, the show hasn’t even begun yet. Why the fuck else would I call them “pussies” in the post title?
Apologies for this avalanche of acronyms, but I’m in shock, you guys…
It’s old news, but for me, it’s new news, because I’ve just caught it on TV, then went to check on the internets, and…
I am not shitting you… Dancing with Steve O will … Sorry, Dancing with the Stars will be on Steve O… Or the other way around… Oh! Ah! Hee! My God, I feel like Kate Winslet at the Golden Globes…
Steve O, dude…
This Steve O right here…
Jackass Steve O.
The guy who made his fame and fortune by drinking urine, squeezing lemon juice in his eyes and stapling his balls to his inner-thighs.
Now that you have all this insider information, can you still look at me in the eyes and tell me that you can imagine this dude dancing the waltz?