If you had told me six months ago that I would one day find myself campaigning for a Palin, I would have had you wrapped in straight jacket faster than Mama Grizzly can say “Gotcha!”
Six months later, here I am, begging you all to pick up the phone and/or get online tonight and vote your asses off for Bristol Palin to become the eleventh winner of Dancing With The Stars, and the most glaringly undeserving person ever to snatch that tacky mirror ball trinket they dare call a trophy.
I beseech you, do it.
Do it for the lulz.
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Man, I haven’t been so proud of my city since the 20th Francofolies, last August. And then the Francofolies before, in 2007; as well as the 25th anniversary of the International Jazz Festival, in 2004. And of course, let’s not forget our 1993 Stanley Cup win -and the riot that ensued-.
In case you wonder, the Francofolies are a 10-days-long Francophone (kind of) music festival. And the International Jazz Festival is pretty self-explanatory, I think. Basically, Montreal is the world’s capital of huge motherfucking festivals, which is something to be proud of because our festivals ROCK, and if you don’t believe me, come and check it out for yourself next July.
Stephen Harper owes me 172.15 bucks. (I just got a phone call from Elections Canada. Find out more about this below.)
Last night, my friend Khristine emailed me, asking what I was doing this evening. I didn’t reply to her, because I didn’t know what to tell her, besides: “It depends on Stephen Harper.” Now, I can email her back to tell her that I will, after all, be free this evening.
But let’s get back to my 172.15$, shall we?
The question is, will I get it?
Maybe. It depends on whether or not I will be available on October 14th, which is something I don’t know yet. Continue reading